no. 74: having time // making time
a much requested deep dive into how I manage my time, the way I think about making time for things I care about, and a peek at my calendar system to keep it all straight.
Even before my time as a creator on the internet, one of the most common types of questions I get from friends, acquaintances (and yes, people on the internet) is about time.
How I have time.
How I manage my time.
How (and more likely than not, why) I manage to *fill* my time the way I do.
In high school I was a consummate over-programmed, over-scheduled, overachiever. AP classes, double season varsity sports, a record breaking number of volunteer hours, and a surprisingly robust social life considering all the other nerd shit I was doing. (shoutout to my high
school for having “smart” kids somehow also be the popular ones – really a life changing sentiment). Add in the fact that I had to drive 35 minutes each way to school, and I got extremely good at managing my time enough to keep all the balls spinning with a fairly high degree of success/
All this was a perfect launching point for my college experience, which I described recently as:
I was always doing The Most. But it never came easily. I am the girl who worked endlessly to be That Girl, but who never quite hit my stride. I double majored. I rowed. I worked multiple work study jobs, collected internships like infinity stones, was president of my society. On paper, I was a certified Wendy. In real life I was playing whack-a-mole attempting to balance all my responsibilities with any semblance of sanity.
(for more on that recommend this post; https://coffeewithmaggie.substack.com/p/sunday-edition-state-of-the-union)
My nearly ten years post college have been a dual journey. First, honing and directing the skills that benefit my ability to do the most in pursuit of the hobbies, interests and social life that make life fulfilling and rewarding. Second (and more challengingly), a gradual unlearning of some of the more unhealthy elements, like the ones that resulted in marathon related overuse injuries in my early twenties, and work related burnout in my early thirties.
Today’s issue is a non-exhaustive look at how I think about time, how I manage my own time, and how I make time for the things that matter the most to me. Collected into major lessons and insights, I’m happy to dig more into any of these topics if they are of interest!
Xx
having time // making time
Identifying values and setting your perspective:
Before you go about setting off to do the most, it’s helpful to figure out where exactly you’re trying to go, why you want to go there, and what it will look like when you do. I find it extremely helpful to think about how the small everyday actions ladder up to the big picture goals I have for my life - then, it becomes easier to defend them against the other, seemingly more urgent things that compete for my time and energy.
Identifying priorities: this might sound both too vague and too woo-woo to be helpful, but I genuinely believe that regularly sitting down and documenting your current priorities is a critical practice. Knowing what kind of person you want to be, and what you want your life to look like is the first step figuring out what you need to do in order to actually achieve that. For me, this can be as simple as an annual vision board or writing exercise focused on what you and your life aspirationally is at some future date: I’m a big fan of simple, affirmative, active tense statements like “I am a person who nurtures and grows her relationships”. There is no limit to the number of statements you can pull together here, but I find that 3-6 is a good amount (while still being manageable).
Time and life audit: If you’re a “I just don’t know where the time goes” kind of person, it can be extremely eye opening to conduct a “time audit” – a to-the-minute accounting of how you spend your time for an entire day or for a handful of days in a typical week. (this how-to includes a template, and I’ve just documented mine in 15 minute increments in google calendar in the past as well!). I’ve also used my screen time app Opal to understand exactly how I’m spending my time on my phone and computer – it is wild to see how a few minutes of scrolling here and there adds up to hours of screen time each day! Once you have a clear picture of how you’re spending your time across work, caregiving, sleep, chores & administration, social, and personal time it can be helpful to categorize how you’re spending the 168 hours in each week to understand the percent allocation you’re currently giving every category (this worksheet is for students, but you get the gist!).